Thursday, November 24, 2016

Thanks Given




i have so much more to be thankful for than i could ever list here.

this old faithful body still carries me through each achingly beautiful
day...i am still filled with curiosity and wonder at all this earth has to
offer...i can explore each day under deep blue skies and sit each
night cloaked in stars as i feel the moon's heartbeat...and the knowing
of this fills my heart with a gladness that is palatable...i still think
deeply...love fiercely...hope relentlessly...and breathe in God's love
for me...i am protected by angels and provided for by the universe...
and i bow my head daily in gratitude for this. i am truly blessed...
and on this day of giving thanks...i send blessings to each of you.
happy thanksgiving...

Monday, November 21, 2016

The Warmth of HIS Hands

i meditate
each morning upon rising
and again each afternoon with
a 'walk and talk'.
 
the cold of the shadows then the
warmth of the sun likens the feeling
i get when asking God to lay his hands
upon me...
 
and i feel....
 
blessed...





Sunday, November 20, 2016

The Warrior My Mother Raised.....




how is it that we lose ourselves in the wanting instead of the having?
i have found that the more time i spend alone the less i want...and i have
spent most of this lifetime alone. my few forays from this way of life have
all taken a toll on my well being....always something like standing on a
precipice when you are bipolar. we bipolars see the world through different
eyes...we think deeper...feel deeper...over analyze every situation...and when
we let ourselves get too happy...too content...we self sabotage because we
don't think we deserve that...and retreat again into our own private worlds.

i've added another mark on the old scarred heart of mine. i knew better than
to 'want'. i fought this last battle like the warrior that my mother raised...but...
now...bloody and spent...i concede...my head bowed in acceptance. it was
inexpressibly beautiful while it lasted... i will always count it as one of
my blessings. and now...as always...i will meet each day with the best that
i have to give...and with prayers... and gratitude...and a wonderment for life.


Saturday, October 15, 2016

This Is What Happy Looks Like


i'm not usually one to post "selfies"...
i never really cared for my looks
but i decided it was time to update my
facebook picture and after i snapped this
shot i realized something....

i
wear
"happy"
well

thank you Universe.....

Wednesday, October 12, 2016

That's What I'm Talking About!



i've spent the biggest part of my life in scuffed up
cowboy boots. horses...rodeos...and general country
life filled my days. the last thirteen years before my
retirement i wore the attire of the ones who put their
own lives on the line to protect yours...the ones with
the bullseye on their backs now... that no one respects.

well...i decided it was time for a new pair of shit kickers!
tin haul boots! that's what i'm talking about. i feel my 
neck getting redder as i speak....


danger...avoid contact...run...

that about sums up what my life is all about right now.
 i'm on the downhill slide with nothing to
lose so tread cautiously friends....

need your shit kicked?

i'm the woman for the job!

Monday, October 3, 2016

Celebrating.....

“Once upon a time, when women were birds, there was the simple understanding that to sing at dawn and to sing at dusk was to heal the world through joy. The birds still remember what we have forgotten, that the world is meant to be celebrated.”
― Terry Tempest Williams, When Women Were Birds
beautiful bird spirit.....

Saturday, October 1, 2016

Hello October




 
 
i found this leaf near my home
i love that it is heart shaped
i love that despite the holes
the nicks
the dings
that heart can still
shine
 
much like the heart in 
my chest
 
thank you Universe....



Friday, September 30, 2016

I'm Ready Universe





I'm ready Universe......


                                 Black Moon in Libra: Set Intentions for a New Life or Love.

{source}
The Libra “Black Moon” occurs on September 30 at 8:11 pm ET here in the Western Hemisphere.
A Black Moon is the second New Moon in any given calendar month, and it carries a supercharged and enhanced New Moon energy with game-changing possibility.

With this one occurring right at the end of the powerful September eclipses and all the shifts, changes and endings they have ushered into our world, this Moon is opening a portal of unimaginable potential.

Black Moons bring the energy of second chances into our world. They bring about closure of the outdated, opening of paths going forward, innovative solutions and new beginnings. This is the perfect time for clearing away old stuck energy to allow for the new to flow in.

Black Moons are a time of letting go of old beliefs that no longer serve us for good, for resetting, for healing, for big change, for surfacing of deep truths, and for new things, like love or deeper connection, to flow. They bring an intensified energy, which makes things manifest quickly and brings huge power to the intentions that we are setting now and what seeds we are planting into the Universe.

This Black Moon is in Libra, which is bringing us into a deep dive on the subject of partnerships, union and harmony. This is a very powerful time to set intentions for deep, lasting, committed partnerships and relationships.

This Moon is opening up a potent relationship portal, and asking us to look within the deepest parts of ourselves and at what we are wanting in regards to real, true union.

This Moon is asking whether we are ready to choose the love that we have been desiring. Are we ready to honor ourselves with self-love and move away from the places that we have been settling for far too long?

Libra is ruled by Venus, and she has been responsible for opening our eyes over the last few years in regards to our relationships, the issues and blocks we have, where we are no longer in alignment, where we are deserving of more, and what our hearts are truly desiring.

She’’s not done yet, and this time she wants to remind us that it is never too late to open ourselves deeper in relationships, or to begin a new love or life elsewhere. She reminds us to tap into our feelings and own them, not to hide them in the shadows. She whispers of the power in our desires and our emotions, and to use them as a compass on our journey forward.

This sign rules marriage and deep commitment, and Venus wants us to dig our roots deeply where they can be harmoniously nourished, not in toxic soil. It’s time for letting go of any of the areas where you are selling yourself short and settling for less.

This is echoed with the last lunar eclipse, which is pulling us out of the old way of thinking how relationships need to be, and into a place where we are ready to redefine and embrace what truly makes us happy.

This energy also highlights divisions among people, and the areas where we have come to a fork in the road. This aspect can show us where we are needing to leave behind and sever old relationships once and for all, ones that do not feed us and are doing us more harm than good.

This Moon asks that we don’’t fall into the trap of indecision and cling to the old ways out of a need for safety. There is better to come when we open to it, and there is so much more coming for us on the road ahead.

This is a time of opening ourselves and realizing how much we deserve. Venus reminds us to aim big here and ask for what we want. Dare to dream, to love, and to give yourself full permission to go after what you really, truly want. Don’t swallow your truth, insist on it.

This Moon is asking you to believe and to trust there is more that is unfolding and about to flow into your world. Anything is possible; never forget that.

As with all New Moons, set your intentions, write abundance checks, enjoy a sacred Moon bath, or use this time to smudge and clear yourself or your environment for the upcoming lunar cycle.
For the time of the New Moon in your area, check the Moon Phases in the Lunar Calendar.

***

CAraCampbell02C. Ara Campbell is a visionary writer, soul guide, cosmic channel, facilitator, artist, and the founder of The Goddess Circle. She is dedicated to the awakening and rising feminine, living embodied truth and aiding others in connecting with their medicine. She is an old soul who has been writing and channeling guidance from the unseen world since she was young, intuitively soul coaching and empowering using spiritual and natural energies. She can usually be found in her native Canada, seeking solace and wisdom in the wild and watching the stars.

Monday, September 26, 2016

I Think I'm In Trouble




this is my Sacred space....
it's where i go with my joys...
my sadness...
problems...
seeking answers...
guidance...

this visit was for guidance.
i spent most of the time in silence...
watching the butterflies...
birds...
the swirl of the water...
listening to the water whisper to me....





 i asked Spirit...the angels...and all those who
have walked before me for guidance.
then i wrote someones name in the sand...
and shouted that name to the top of my lungs...
for the Universe to hear...

as i looked down at the sand where i had just
written the name...i found my answer...


 i think i'm in trouble......









Tuesday, September 13, 2016

Centering.....

no art..
no creativity....
just trying to center myself
amid a whirlwind of 
emotions...
Yuki from Johan Planefeldt on Vimeo.


Thursday, September 8, 2016

A Seriously Awesome Day!




what a seriously awesome day today!
i started my morning here with a good
cup of coffee as i watched the sunrise
then did my morning meditation.

a little later in the morning i headed out
for a little junking and boy howdy did
i hit the jackpot!


i got these drapes and valances for my
bedroom.....$10

got these drapes for the living room...$10
(they feel like tapestry and must weigh 10 lbs!)

these pictures...the large ones were $6 each
the smaller ones $4 

and then..................
 

my $25 find...

WOOT!

happy
happy
camper




Wednesday, September 7, 2016

Progress


....making progress on my coat collage!

Tuesday, September 6, 2016

Stitching....


still stitching.....

Saturday, September 3, 2016

I Got My Heart Broke

i broke my own heart today....

i cut that awesome lining out of my barn coat.




 
i LOVED that lining...but...
 
 that wool was seriously itchy!
 
also...i'm really hot natured and the more
i thought about it the more i realized it would
have to be extremely cold for me to be able to
wear this coat... and once it's tricked out i'm gonna 
want to be styling and profiling.

i've saved the lining to use in other projects and
will probably add a little to the outside of the coat.
the batting between the lining and the denim was
all wadded up and...as you can see...looked like
something that came out of a rat's nest.

life lesson #......(i've lost count!):
next time you want to cut up a vintage wool
material...DO....IT....OUTSIDE!!!
(what a mess...)

Friday, September 2, 2016

Blessed.....

we've had an unusually cool day today compliments of
hurricane hermine. i love nesting on a rainy day! got started
on my coat...





i really need to go junking for some old funky looking
clothes to repurpose. i've got so many ideas of things that
i want to add to this "canvas". 

spent some time in the studio today prepping papers for
 my heat sealed collage play. i can't wait to begin.

it's such a blessing to be able to putter around instead of 
working for a living! people often ask me if i get bored 
since i retired. the answer is NO....i love every nanosecond.

Wednesday, August 31, 2016

On Disappointments And Being Broke

so... i got the chore coat that i bought on ebay and
it REEKED of old funky mildew. i sure didn't expect
that! i contacted the seller and he offered to pay for 
dry cleaning. i thanked him but declined...i'm not a 
fan of wearing clothing soaked in chemicals...so he
did give me a partial refund..which was nice. i'm
chomping at the bit to begin my boro repairs but
i'm still washing and sunning the coat....sigh.

in the mean time:





i'm going to be playing with acrylic heat sealed collage!
i stumbled across some how to's in youtube land and
decided to give it a try. as usual...with a whole studio
of supplies i didn't have the products needed for this
process so i had to order the mediums. there's a
reason Golden begins with GOLD!!! thank goodness
i had a little birthday money.

and the playing begins...

Sunday, August 21, 2016

Color Me Happy!

well.....
i've finally decided how i will use my textile meditations!
since my birthday is coming up this week i've splurged on
a vintage denim jacket to trick out:


it's a 1950's montgomery ward powrhouse 
sanforized chore jacket. 


there are lots of opportunities for some boro mending:




i really like the blanket lining in this jacket:


happy birthday to me.....
color me happy!

Saturday, August 20, 2016

I Am the Captain of My Soul




 
"it matters not how strait the gate
how charged with punishments the scroll
i am the master of my fate
i am the captain of my soul"


a quote from my favorite poem:
invictus
                                                      ~ william ernest henley
 
 
 
 today's textile meditation....
 

Friday, August 19, 2016

Aye Eye Sir!


i finished another piece for my... journal cover?

...altered shirt/jacket?

...fabric collage?

i seriously don't know where i'm going
with these pieces but i'm loving this 
whole slowstitching thingy!

liz kettle has a video showing how 
she uses stitching small fabric
pieces as a daily meditation. i 
meditate each morning using the
insight timer app but find creating 
these small works of art just as
calming.

Wednesday, August 17, 2016

More Slow Stitching





slowstitching....
meditative...
calming...

i'm not sure where i'm going with this piece...
it will probably be used on a journal cover...but...
maybe an altered shirt..
we'll see.
 
i treated myself to these kotobuki traditional 
thread scissors and ring thimble. the thimble
really helps when sewing through painted cloth.
 
 
 
* the circle design is from a jude hill class 
 
**the face is from a printable for members of
teesha moore's artstronauts club that i 
transferred to fabric

Monday, August 15, 2016

A Little Wabi Sabi Anyone?

sooooo.....

sew.....

my nemesis and i got along
surprisingly well.





i'm taking Susie LaFond's Curious Bundles class
(she is such a creative soul) and decided to make
a gift as my first project.

my sister in law has a birthday soon and since
she doesn't journal i thought i'd  make her a 
note pad cover. she works for an auctioneer and
spends a good deal of her time cataloging items
for the sales. 

this is my first attempt using some of the methods in
Susie's class. the above picture is the front 
cover. here's the back:




and the inside:




i used felt for the inside of this cover just to give it
a little structure. i thought about making some type
of closure but decided it would be better for her to
be able to just flip it open when needed.

as far as the sewing....i'll have to say i prefer hand
sewing to machine sewing. i really didn't have a
hard time with the machine...i was even able to
refill the bobbin twice while making this with
no incidence other than the thread looking like
a birds nest on the bobbin...but it worked fine.
the biggest problem was sewing straight lines...
which is this users fault and not the machine...
although Susie stresses to go with the flow and
don't worry about things like that.

i'm just thankful for the concept of wabi sabi.

* i decided to personalize this a little by adding
a picture of my brother that was transferred to
cloth and put in an old film negative holder. even
after 27 years of marriage they are still that couple
that are joined at the hip and she will like seeing
his smiling face.

 

Friday, August 12, 2016

Me vs My Nemesis

and it begins....

again...



Tuesday, August 9, 2016

Old Friends

these are my favorite jeans:




 
i can't even remember how long i've had them.
they are so worn that you can literally see daylight
through the material when they are held up to the
light....sigh.
 
get a stain...slap on some paint
 
another hole...boro
 
thank goodness for boro:
 
 


 
 
my stubborn self is just not going to let this
old friend go any time soon.

here is how i foresee my friend's future:


me and you...bud

me and you..

Saturday, July 30, 2016

WTH????

soooooooo....Threat Assessment started following
me on Twitter...
 
Whhh...
 
WHAT????




Thursday, July 28, 2016

Is There Anybody Out There?




 
Another entry for my journal: MY DYSFUNCTIONS..
a journal for chronicling my immeasurably fascinating
 dysfunctions..neuroses..emotions..inner child..moments
 of shame and doubt..projection..self-loathing..misanthropy..
and completely normal insanity..because the only difference between
 me and the rest of the population is that I acknowledge
 how crazy I am and they're all in mind-numbing denial.
 
we all have them....

Wednesday, July 27, 2016

Half Goddess Half Hell




today's journal spread...

"half goddess...half hell"

sounds about right...
 
some days
 
i
 
don't
 
recognize
 
myself...

 
 


Saturday, July 23, 2016

CRAZY iS tHe nEw sAnE

sooooo.....
do i win the award for worst blogger?

sorry....
i've been fighting demons.


this is today's journal spread.
when i watch the news..
or read everyone's facebook posts..
i can't help but think 

CRAZY
IS
THE 
NEW
SANE
 
 

Monday, June 6, 2016

Life Lessons




i started my morning with a little journaling.
it's been hot and rainy this past week... outside
is like a sauna...and i'm waiting for the grass to
dry enough to mow my yard.

i've put my car camping adventure on hold for a
while. i had someone living in a house that i own
next door who packed an overnight bag and walked
out leaving the place in a terrible mess. so during
this heat...and in between the rains...i've spent my
time carrying off trash and junk. one week down
and i'm only on the kitchen! i'm really not liking
how it looks like i'll be spending my summer....on
top of the money spent to have a trailer hitch installed
and purchase a small utility trailer so i can clean 
this house. 

oh well...
life lessons.....

Monday, May 23, 2016

Queen of Stealth




first night camping report:

crawled into car around 11:00pm

between the full moon and the outside light it
was awfully bright without curtains

even with a few clouds i enjoyed a stellar
view of the stars before drifting off to sleep

dreamed about stealth camping in a residential
neighborhood with a plethora of friends and
acquaintances showing up throughout the dream
i live in the country and don't have close
neighbors   (.....very strange dream)

woke to the sound of gentle tapping and 
was immediately reminded of finding a 
mouse in the car last summer

realized the sound was rain...  grabbed keys....
leaned over front seat to start car and roll windows
up....

SET OFF CAR ALARM
(cue the police song king of pain and insert
queen of stealth...sigh)

after much fumbling managed to get
alarm turned off

potty break

pulled blanket over head and
slept until morning

first night:   done!

Sunday, May 22, 2016

Honda Fit Conversion Part 2

things are slowly moving along with my "camper" car.
i wasn't able to find a fleece blanket at any of the thrift
stores around here so i finally just bought an inexpensive
full/queen fleece blanket at wal-mart for $10. i was able
to cut two long strips and two squares out of one blanket. 
here is one of the strips that will cover the side windows:





i glued velcro strips along the top with E6000 glue.
from what i've read it should hold up to the heat. (the
white showing is some parchment paper i put under
the glued strips so the window cover doesn't become
a permanent part of my kitchen floor) i won't be able
to tell if i need to put velcro along the bottom until i
see how they are going to hang. i really didn't want to
glue the mounting strips to my car headliner so i'm
going to try securing them with horizontal straight
pins to see if that will work...seemed to work fine
with a sample but we'll have to see with the weight
of the curtain. i've made velcro curtains for the side
windows and the back hatch window but have
opted to stretch a bungee cord across the front from
overhead handle to handle and clip the curtain onto
the cord with binder clips so i can slide the curtain.
i'm also planning to use binder clips in each of the
corners where the curtains meet. i'll post pics when
everything is in place.

meanwhile.... i'm going to spend my first night in
the car in my yard tonight....sans curtains. here is
a pic from the back of my couch pillow bed:


i've got my handy dandy window screens on the back
windows so i can leave them open if it's too hot. i'm
thinking of cutting a little drop down panel in the 
curtains over the back windows for when i need
them open but i did buy the battery powered fan for
comfort. you'll notice i left the passenger side back
seat up...here's why:





the seat part folds up leaving plenty of room for me to
stand stooped over in the car for when i need to potty. 
i purchased a freshette...
 
 
 
......which i totally
expected to cause tears of laughter and tears of
wee to run down my legs but was surprised to see
there was no learning curve....works like a charm.
(WHERE was this thing all those years i was on the
road in law enforcement????) i think after getting used
to sleeping in the car i won't need standing space
to wee in a jug and can leave both back seats
down for more storage space.



so....first night
wish me luck!