things i've learned

i've kept my two and four year old granddaughters for the last five days while their mother was at the hospital with their new baby brother. during the course of those days my grans have taught me some valuable lessons.

1. when buying new sippy cups it's better to get two of the same color and style and just write their names on them.

2. when washing dishes cartoons will keep little girls occupied but the second nature calls you will have an audience.

3. there is no sound that compares to the shrieks of two little girls who have seen a spider.

4. when trying to sneak in a cup of coffee and a minute of silence before the girls wake up from their naps....... sounds are magnified one hundred times.

5. always let little girls eat in their panties and diaper unless you want to change clothes......again.

6. putting a clean diaper on a two year old is like cleaning out the kitty litter box.....the second it's clean all bets are off.

7. after five days with two little girls i could never in a hundred years forget my name.......i've been reminded of it often.......sometimes amid high pitched shrieks and grappling over a toy....other times in a song......made up exclusively of the words "gramma jody".

8. the words "don't run in the house" are as useless as pissing on a fan.

9. when washing your face with a two year old in the bathroom it's best to keep one eye open so you can catch the baby doll before it's dunked into the toliet.

10. in the long run, it would have taken less time to walk two little girls inside the bank than it took to clean the red sucker they got at the drive thru off the seat.

11. when grocery shopping with two little girls in the shopping cart you have to buy two of everything whether you need it or not.

12. nothing melts your heart like seeing two little girls tangled up together......finally sleeping at the end of the day.