What the Heart Knows

after my morning prayer/meditation i sat with a realization.

prayers for friends included three with heart attacks...two

with hip surgeries...all a little older than my 63

revolutions around the sun. each of these friends require daily

medications for their quality of life. 

i don't...i do heavy work outside daily and welcome

the spent muscles come night fall.

i also realized that i identify with being bipolar.

it's through no fault of my own that i have this mental disorder...

but it is NOT who i am. i spent this day "observing" the entity

that chatters in my mind and saw that "I" am something separate.

when all the "monkey mind" cranked up i focused on being

present...my breathing...the birds singing...the sensation of my
fingers rubbing together...how the sun felt like a warm hug...this

was "me"...not all the angst and "not good enough" feelings being

whispered in my head. my mind seems to be addicted to pain...
playing movies of what has happened...may or
may not ever happen again.

but my heart knows

it knows...

me

so...tonight i sit...

a little long in the tooth

but truly blessed

looking forward to

getting reacquainted with

me